little banana

This is the cute fleece yellow suit that bridget gave jack. Its very warm and cozy.. perfect for our early morning walks.

Steve Holt!*

I am afraid to write this.. I'll do it because this is not paper .. It is some computer that google owns.. who knows where, we'll never know so it's almost like this is recorded nowhere. Hence the gods of sleep will not punish me for my hubris.

Jack has started sleeping through the night - all the way through the night. I can count on him going to bed between 6 and 8 pm and waking up between 6 and 7 am. Occasionally, he wakes up once for a few minutes to eat but I don't even count that. If he does that for the rest of his life, I can deal with it. It feels like nothing. Until he was 3 months old, he never slept more than 3 hours at a time at most. I resigned myself to the fact that I did not have a "champion sleeper" as some of other moms in first weeks have.. "Junior sleeps constantly and I am finishing my MD in my free time." Getting a full night's sleep is amazing.

It happened just in time because I started working again this weekend. Jack was asleep yesterday when I left and that was sad. It was the longest I had gone without seeing him awake. Luckily for me, I work with lots of women with kids so everyone likes to talk about their kids and show pictures. It helps.

*If you don't know why I titled this entry 'Steve Holt', you must run to the video store to rent seasons 1 through 3 of Arrested Development. Your life is not fully lived without seeing this show.

Road Trip

Since I finished my chem class on Monday and I don't start working again until tomorrow, Jack and I went on a little road trip. First we went to Astoria to visit one of my friends from college and her family. Her boys (identical twins) are almost 4 and they love babies. Throughout our visit, they were only allowed to touch Jack's feet so when we took this picture they were extremely excited to be in such close proximity. After I snapped the picture, in a matter of seconds, one of them was touching Jack's face while the other tried to poke him in the eye. They were just being friendly in their 4 year old way.



Then we went to Hood River to visit some other college friends of mine. Hood River is such a cool town.. very popular for all manner of outdoor activities especially kite boarding and wind surfing. My friends live very close to downtown.. we walked to a fancy restaurant that has an amazing happy hour menu.. they have no problems with babies in the bars there unlike Seattle establishments. My friends have a great piece of property with a little guest house in their backyard where Jack and I stayed. If I didn't love Seattle so much, I would move to Hood River.. and probably live in this guest house.



Jack was pretty laid back about the trip. He slept in the car as I drove from town to town. He did get cranky at the end of each day .. I understand the quality of sleep they get in a car seat is not the same as what they get at home. Other than that, he seemed to enjoy himself quite a bit.

Motherhood Rocks!

I don't usually keep in touch with what tori spelling is doing.. but one of my google homepage widgets displays People magazine headlines .. so I know that she just had a baby. The headline says "Tori Spelling: Motherhood Rocks"

Does it really rock?

If you asked me how I felt the day I brought Jack home, I would have said that I feel like I was literally and metaphorically hit by a truck. When asked how is it, I would have said overwhelming. Of course, every new parent has a unique experience so I will allow that maybe for Tori, who goes home to a house full of people who wait on her, it may rock. But unless she gave birth in a way I am not aware of, there is more to the experience of being a new parent than just .. it rocks.

So here is a piece of evidence.. in case you didn't believe me.. there isn't a lot of honesty "out there" about the new parent experience. What did I expect from tori, you may ask. Nothing less than this.. which is my point.

On the fence

Before I had Jack, I was fairly ambivalent about children. I was not particularly drawn to them, and I wasn't particularly excited about having one. I felt like it was something I might regret not doing but I was not really sure about why I wanted to do it. To people who know it's not right for them, I say great. One can live a full life without children. I have had occasion to talk to people who are on the fence as I was. I say to them, if I knew then what I knew now, I would have done it sooner. If there wasn't such a huge population problem and Seattle wasn't so darn expensive, I'd have many. I had a feeling this might happen.. this radical shift to a have-a-child cheerleader. I watched it happen to so many of my friends. One day they were interested in talking about politics and relationships and celebrity gossip; then they have a kid and all they want to talk about is the advantages and disadvantages of the family bed or diapers or spit up or ear infections or whatever other extremely boring thing their kid happened to be going through at the moment. And, they were just thrilled about it. Now, if I am talking to another parent.. yep, there is no child-related minutiae I don't enjoy talking about. Crazy.

Happy its-almost-spring!

On Monday I will be finished with my epic chemistry course. I started it at the end of September..and even though my due date was November 24 and the class didn't finish until December 14, I thought I could probably finish. I would just do homework while the new baby slept and then take the final. The fact that I ever thought this makes me laugh out loud. Clearly, I had no idea.



I am marveling at the change of season because I remember staring out this same window in November and December thinking it would always be dark; it would always either be raining or snowing or hailing, and that would be my life forever. It's true what they say -- what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. I am thrilled with the cherry blossoms.



While I am at school, Bridget is now taking care of another baby while she watches Jack. The little one's name is Lily and she is 7 days older than Jack. She has stunning motor skills for her age - she can roll over, push her torso up so far she looks like she is doing upward dog, and she seems to be trying to crawl. She has a lot of energy whereas Jack just seems more chill. I didn't really think he had much of a personality yet but compared to another baby, he does. Do any of us have personality when not compared to anyone else?



Also, we went to a St Patrick's day party on Sunday. I dressed Jack in his finest Irish themed clothing.. His new thing is that he won't fall asleep unless he is at home.. this is a problem because he gets very cranky when we are out and he is overdue for sleep... as you can see here. Normally Bridget makes him very happy... but not when he is tired.

Gushing

Yesterday, jack squealed with delight as he lay under his new gymini. He had never squealed and he is just starting to laugh.

Before I go on, I must write a disclaimer. A few months ago, a woman in first weeks said that when her husband asked her what she wanted for christmas, she said she'd already gotten her present (referring to her son). I thought this was a lovely thing to say but the comment stuck in my head because it's something I would never say. I don't want to gush about motherhood because I feel obligated to do it. I don't understand where the pressure comes from but the book The Mommy Myth proposes some ideas. In any case, I try not to precede any critiques I have with this experience with the sentiment that I love Jack and would throw myself in front of a train for him. I notice people do this all the time. "I am so in love with Junior but the sleep deprivation is really getting to me" or "Of course I love being a mom but diaper changing is not my thing" or whatever. All statements have to be preceded with the good mother disclaimer. Gushing is acceptable, socially appropriate and encouraged; negative feelings need to be couched with gushing. It's a drag. How about balance? It seems all parents feel everything -- why the pressure to hide?

So all that said, now I have to gush. The noise of Jack squealing and laughing is the sound of pure joy. It makes me happy and I am so grateful for his presence. And we love this gymini. It's a must have for all wee ones.