Saturday, April 23, 2016


When I was pregnant with Jack and working in an ER, a fellow tech (aspiring firefighter) told me the following story:  When he was a kid, his mom told him and his sister that if anyone ever molested them, they needed to tell her. She would then kill the person who hurt them. She would go to jail but that was ok because what really mattered is that her children were safe from the person who hurt them.

This is not what people advise telling their children in regard to pedophiles. However, for whatever reason, this guy always felt safe knowing his mother would kill anyone who hurt him in that way.

I had to spend two hours of my morning attending a class called 'Safeguarding God's children' in order to volunteer with kids within the Episcopal church. I got to learn all the ways that pedophiles identify victims and perpetrate crimes. I watched videos where actual convicted pedophiles described how they operated.

I am grateful for increased awareness around this issue. I also struggle with an enormous amount of rage after spending two hours with this "problem." There is a place deep in my brain that was programmed millions of years ago when my ancestors were lizards. I am programmed to protect my children (all children) at the expense of my own life and well-being. I cannot overcome this programming. So I am think I am telling the truth when I say that if killing a pedophile were legal, I could do it. I think most mothers could do it in fact.

Saturday, April 16, 2016


As I have written before, we are a family that skies dammit. Perhaps because of their privilege and my attitude, the kids complain about skiing at one of the world's most amazing ski resorts. By day 2 though, they are happy. Exercise and adventure makes them happy. They don't have good form but they point their skis down the mountain and fly down. It's exhilarating.

This spring break, we met up with two other kids in Sonia's class who have been skiing for years. All the families skied together. I love skiing because we are active and outside surrounded by beauty beyond measure. I value experience over any possession so I just don't care about the cost (although the Canadian exchange rate is amazing right now. Go oil supply glut).

randsom sonia selfie