Death

Jack has been asking me about death lately. Will I die? he asks. For a while, I didn't answer the question directly. I said, when you are really, really, really old.. waaaaay in the future ... far away. Then finally, yesterday I said, yes, one day, you will die. He said, oh no. And sounded very sad. I have since introduced the idea of heaven. Earlier today, he asked me where he was when Ryan and I did our cross-country cycling ride. I told him he was in heaven. I said it was outside of space. You live there before are born and after you die. Mainly, I do not want Jack to have existential anxiety when he is 5. I remember when my mom explained what heaven was. I was also 5. I was raised Catholic so it seemed to fit with my idea of reality. I asked her what you wore in heaven and she said nothing. This caused me a lot of concern but I did not worry about dying. I don't think I challenged this idea until high school. Ryan is an atheist but has promised to go along with my story. We really don't know what happens when we die anyway so I am not exactly lying. It helps me introduce my idea of God to Jack which has been difficult to do since we don't go to church. We are talking more about other peoples' religions. His questions are always so big.

Don't call me stupid

Yesterday, Jack was upset because I had said movie time was over. He really cannot regulate his emotions around screen time. Every Friday, we allow him a movie or video game -- usually for no more than 1 hour. Every Friday, when it's over, he freaks out. He screams. He cries. It doesn't matter that I remind him not to do this before movie time starts. So yesterday, in addition to the usual drama, he called me stupid. He has said this before and I have told him not to do it. We were supposed to have ice cream last night and after he told me I was stupid, I told him that was not ok to do. It is mean and disrespectful. I told him I would never call him stupid for those reasons (and for others obviously). We are introducing the idea of consequences. The consequence for calling me stupid was that we cancelled ice cream. He was upset about this but after a while, he understood. We'll see if he does it again. I said 'don't call me stupid' several times. Each time I thought of Kevin Kline's character in A Fish Called Wanda. It made me feel silly. Being a stern parent does not come naturally. That said, don't call me stupid!

Lazy days

We are moving slowly this summer. On Friday, we didn't get out of the house until noon. Then we just hung around the neighborhood. We love to walk around and pick raspberries. Jack spent some time on his pedal bike (it has training wheels). We wandered down the street to watch construction of a new house. We took the bike trailer to the video store and rented The Return of the Jedi for movie night. Jack then changed his mind and wanted to watch Mary Poppins. I think Star Wars in movie form is thrilling and terrifying to Jack so when given the chance to watch, he often opts out. On our slow mornings we read. The kids play (usually not with each other). Sonia is always very busy and entertains herself very easily. She has been into dress-ups as they call the dress up clothes. Jack gets antsy but often finds something else to do as long as he knows we have some plan to get out of the house later. Yesterday, our morning was similar. We played with the neighbors a bit then went to the downtown Seattle Public Library via the light rail. We haven't been to the central branch in a while. The kids loved the play area and they have a great selection of books. For dinner, we hit a family fave 'U Need a Burger.' Our weather has been less than awesome. However, we really don't mind. It's generally not cold or rainy. I loved seeing the sun today but have given up complaining about the weather. Sonia in her "dress-up"

Jack climbed up a Japanese Maple

Summer?

We've been having fun since school ended. Many of our days are slow. Jack went to a museum of flight camp one week that he seemed to like. It went from 9-4 every day so he was beyond exhausted at the end of every day. Because it's warm we just go outside and hang out. It's been fun going to the pool, picking berries (now raspberries), going to different beaches and the wading pool, and just wandering around the neighborhood. We've also met with some of Jack's fellow kindergartners. It's hard to believe he'll be heading to kindergarten. He seems ambivalent about it. I feel the same. Some of the time, I am excited, others, I think I should homeschool. I know he can't have an idea of what it means to go to kindergarten. Either do I really. The public school system of Seattle seems mysterious. I am sure I'll have lots to report. Sonia has developed a very strong opinion about her clothing. She decides what she wears. It's usually something reasonable with a princess or fairy costume over it. Jack recently wanted to leave the house with his shirt on backwards and two different shoes on. I didn't mind but Ryan made him change.

Summer!

Both kids "graduated" from their schools. Luckily, Sonia and Jack will be returning to Sonia's school (formerly Jack's too) for a little 4 week summer camp in July. Sonia still asks every day if she is going to Kim's. Kim made a cake on the last day of school with a picture of the girls on it: Jack's school had a ceremony. I teared up a bit. It was very sweet and a little sad. I'll miss the parents and kids from his class. Luckily, several of the parents have kids Sonia's age so we'll meet again in the fall when Sonia goes there. The new pace of summer is really nice. We don't have to be anywhere. Next week, Jack will attend a much-anticipated camp at the Museum of Flight but other than that, our summer is very low-key. We joined an outdoor pool in Bellevue. It's very simple but perfect. Both kids love it. We go rain or shine, cold or hot.. there's been much more rain and cold lately. Jack especially is very enthusiastic about swimming. He can swim under water but can't make it to the surface on his own. He is very tenacious though. He tries and tries. Swimming is the first athletic activity that Jack seems to love. It's fun to watch.

Sonia the soccer star

A few days ago, Sonia was bothering Jack. He tried to hit her but he missed. In response, she threw herself a couple of feet and hit the floor crying in agony. I didn't do anything but Jack asked her if she was ok. After a minute, she said she was.. I now wonder how many times I have run to her and she's been faking it. Lately, she's also been pretending to be asleep in the car. I think it's great that she already gets pretend .. perhaps she has a future in the theater or on the soccer field. She already handles many complex concepts. It's amazing what an advantage it is to have an older sibling. There are times I can't believe she's only 2 and other times that I am reminded how little 2 really is.. I am usually the first one up in the morning. Ryan and Jack sleep in and Sonia gets up after I do. Whenever she wakes up I can hear her open her door. I walk toward her and when she sees me she always runs into my arms to snuggle. It is such a sweet moment in my day.

Kids say the funniest things

I think that is the title of a book. It's true though. They say some really hilarious stuff. Recently, I was reading Jack a book about a bird named Calvin who loves books. His friends call him a bookworm. Jack asked me what that meant. I said a bookworm is someone who loves books. Jack said, ' I am a bookworm and an airplane worm.' Tonight Sonia was coughing and I asked her if she was ok. She said, 'yes, I just had some danger in my mouth.' Fair enough.. It's really miraculous to watch them become fluent speakers but it is also a very funny process.

Conner

For several months, Sonia has had an invisible friend named Conner (or maybe Connor?). Conner has always been a girl dog. Recently, at her preschool, she found a little stuffed dog and named it Conner. She does not go anywhere without Conner.. not even to sleep. So god help me if I can't find Conner. She seems to get lost when we need to be somewhere quickly so I find myself racing around the house asking everyone if they've seen Conner and feeling a little silly about the urgency I feel to find ... her. She is very real to Sonia. It's great really because we will never have a dog of our own so Conner is a reasonable compromise.

A few final London pics

I still miss London but I have re-adjusted to life in Seattle after feeling pretty low for about a week. I realized I still had a few pictures on my camera. Sonia and my friend Kate's youngest .. doing what all the kids loved best: dress-up!

Sonia in front of the yellow submarine at the Beatles museum in Liverpool

A ferris wheel in Liverpool -- much loved by the kids.. provided great views of the city

My friends live on a mews. I never really understood what this meant.. but here is a picture of one. It's two rows of homes separated by a street which I think used to be garden space.. I am not sure.. there are mews everywhere in London.

Welcome baby Beaux!

My brother and sister-in-law had their baby boy last night. My brother called me after he was born to say the baby was having trouble breathing. When he told me what the hospital staff was doing I knew Beaux had to be ok. He was not intubated.. plus other details that told me the people caring for him thought he would get better on his own. I was very calm. Of course I was. I told my bro how terrified I was when Jack was born and had a health issue. I've learned so much since then about the strength and resilience of the young.

Little Beaux will be in the hospital until tomorrow. I am so excited to meet him. I told Ryan how nostalgic I am for a tiny baby.. so sweet. Luckily for my nephew I have energy for him since I don't have a baby of my own. I wish they lived here but I'll visit them soon.

Life at home

After a week, it seems we have adjusted to life in Seattle. We are over the jet lag. The luggage is put away. The kids talk about London a little bit but only when reminded of something they saw or did there. There are a couple of things I am doing differently. 1. I am air-drying my laundry. We did this in London. It works and saves energy. 2. I am picking Jack up from school in either the bike trailer or the stroller on the days when Sonia doesn't have school. I love how little we used cars in London ( I was only in a taxi a few times). The car is just not fun in comparison to walking or scooting or cycling. Our hills make it more challenging but I am determined. When I arrived, I was sad to be here. I find life here so lonely in comparison to what it was like there. I miss the vitality of London. All this is not bad though. The trip gave me a great deal of courage regarding traveling with children. I look forward to our next trip! One last picture from the trip. These were some of the chocolates from paul a young in london. So delicious.

The end of our amazing vacation

Last Wednesday, we visited the Bank of England museum (lots of old currency and videos about inflation) then took the tube out to Stratford. We had tickets to see an Olympic qualifying event at the aquatic center. This is a building always featured in pictures advertising the Olympics. It's beautiful.

The architect is Zaha Hadid. Her picture was featured at the national Portrait Gallery. She's Iraqi born but moved to England for graduate school -- She studied with Rem Koolhas who designed the Seattle Public Library central building among many other buildings. The Olympic Stadium is next door. To get there, we went through the largest shopping mall in Europe. It's basically behind the mall. Then we spent a long time going through security. The event was fun to watch but I cannot imagine navigating the crowds that will be there during the actual Olympics.

On Thursday, we traveled to York. It's a very old city. It became York in 1212 but was around long before that. It's filled with medieval buildings and surrounded by old, old walls some even built by the Romans. We toured a Viking museum. In the 70's someone discovered some Viking artifacts by accident. When archeologists started to dig, they found the remains of a relatively large and prosperous Viking village. They know details such as the color of the clothes the people wore. They recreated the village and we went on a little gondola ride through it. York has lots of tiny pedestrian-only streets so it was fun to wander around. Their cathedral is incredible but like so many churches here they charge quite a bit of money to tour the church. We were content to hang out in the entry.

We toured the remains of a 13th century castle built by Henry III... It had a great view. Thursday we had pretty bad weather -- lots of rain. We ran back to the hotel after the castle but were soaked. Friday we headed to Liverpool. Most of what we saw was new.. old docks rebuilt for tourists. We saw the Beatles museum (privately owned.. very fun .. lots of memorabilia), the maritime museum (the Titanic was built in Liverpool. It sunk 100 years ago this month so there was a big Titanic exhibit). We also got to tour a little bit of the Tate museum there (nice kid area.. a floor of interesting sculpture -- such as that rather odd Jeff Koons work of the three basketballs). We went on a ferris wheel ride for a nice view of the city. It's a very industrial place We returned to London on Saturday.. had down time with the kids then the adults went out to a restaurant specializing in a British cuisine ( I had a pot pie ). Today, it was sunny most of the day. We visited the lovely Holland Park. The playground equipment here is so cool -- trampolines, climbing ropes, swinging ropes, hills, ziplines.. it's cool. The kids had a blast. We are now preparing to leave tomorrow. We don't really want to go. It's been so fun.

Days 15 and 16

I started this post last Wednesday.. It's Saturday night, we just got home from travelling to York and Liverpool and the adults are going out on the town. More details to follow but here's last Tuesday. I'll update more tomorrow and add pictures. Tuesday we decided to have a mellow day. The kids seem to be struggling -- we have kept a pretty busy pace and I think sometimes it's just too much. In the morning, I took Jack and Kate's oldest to a nearby community pool. The kids area was a pretty large pool that was less than 3 feet deep. Jack loved it and practiced his "swim test" many times -- meaning he swam underwater for several feet. Pretty big leap for him. We stayed there for over and hour then met all the kids at the neighborhood park.

Ryan had gone to the Churchill War rooms in the morning. In the afternoon, I went out to the National Portrait Gallery. They display portraits of mostly British people from the last 500 years. One portrait that caught my attention was one of Queen Victoria handing a bible to a King from an African country. The anecdote behind the picture was that the King had asked Victoria to explain the reason behind the English Empire's success and in response, she handed him a bible. I thought that if that were true, the state of Mississippi would produce many more nobel laureates. The success of English civilization over the last 500 years is remarkable. The gallery is filled with scientists, artists, monarchs, politicians (did you know Margaret Thatcher was a research chemist then a tax lawyer before she was Prime Minister?), architects, explorers, and on and on all from this tiny little island.

After the museum I met Ryan, Stephen and Kate in the very vibrant Soho district. Kate remembered we were near a famous chocolate shop called Paul Young chocolates. She said their hot chocolate was amazing and they closed soon so we had to have dessert first. We had a long discussion with the man who worked behind the chocolate bar about their chocolates. I had a stilton cheese and port dark chocolate truffle then one with various citrus flavors that needed to be eaten last because of the way the flavors "popped." Then we had a thick, non-dairy hot chocolate that was the best I have ever had. It was unreal.

Quick non-update

I am in a hotel room in Liverpool. Everyone is asleep. I've been meaning to update the blog with our adventures but we've been busy and now I'm tired.. Will get it updated tomorrow by 9pm GMT (kind of cool to be on Greenwich mean time

Day 14

Yesterday was sunny. Jack had his heart set on the London Eye ever since he saw the London Eye on a video on the British Airways plane, and it seemed like the perfect day to do it.

We had all planned to go until we learned it would cost $200 for 5 people. Ryan took Jack and they had a great time. Since they went at 1130am, they got a bird's eye view of the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace. They got a great view of London for miles because it was a clear day.

Meanwhile, Kate and I attempted to take the kids to the Natural History Museum. Something has happened to Sonia these last couple of days. At first I thought she was getting sick because she was so cranky. She is crying constantly, won't follow directions and picks on Kate's youngest constantly. I got to see a few things at the museum but Sonia wasn't interested.

Entrance to museum:

We met Ryan and Jack in front of their amazing Science museum that is next door. This was marginally better since Sonia slept for a while and Jack got to play at a dedicated kids area. Once Sonia and Kate's youngest woke up, everything became chaotic. The kids were running in all directions. So we decided to go outside.

We went to Hyde Park. The sun was shining. It was warm and the kids were happy just running around. Jack and Kate's son played with sticks until that ended in the obvious way. We hung out in front of the Prince Albert memorial. He died in 1861 and the Queen wore black to mourn his death for 40 years. She also built a huge memorial to him. I asked Ryan if he'd mourn my death by building me a memorial and he laughed. Hmm. We in the 21st century are not so sentimental I guess.

Ryan had spent the afternoon in the Science Museum so Monday evening, I went out for a few hours on a walking tour around Westminster. I loved hearing all the facts about the area. The Abbey was built in the 11th century. William the Conquerer was the first monarch to be crowned there in 1066. Every English monarch since has been crowned in Westminster Abbey. While standing in front of the abbey, we watched Camilla Parker Bowles- the wife of Charles - drive out (or rather be driven out) in a big black car -- no tinted windows and a royal flag waving on the car. I learned the famous Parliament building and Big Ben were built in the 1800's after the original Westminster palace burned down. We toured a residential neighborhood that looked a lot like Georgetown in DC where houses sold for no less than 10 million pounds. A big highlight was touring the Parliament building and watching a debate of the lower house. The debate was on the issue of taxation -- removing tax loopholes I believe. I learned that the average British family of 4 earns 20,000 pounds. 14,000 people earn over a million pounds a year. Many, many people must earn well into the 6 figures here. I see so many luxury cars and it is wildly expensive to live here. The home we are staying in costs more than $4000 a month.

I jumped on the bus around 10pm and returned to Kate's. I've been listening to the Hunger Games. Wow. What a great read! The movie is advertised everywhere here. I'll have to catch it when I return home.

Days 11-13

On Friday, we had a mellow day. We'd traveled a lot Thursday and knew we were going out of town for the weekend. We took the kids to the park by Kate's in the morning. We went to lunch at a very kid friendly place called Giraffe. Kate had told me that London is very kid-friendly. It is remarkable how much more kid-friendly it is than Seattle. People seem to really like kids here. The restaurant had a healthy, delicious and affordable kids menu. There were lots of kids there but it wasn't chaotic. The staff were very friendly and playful with the kids. I notice it when I have a stroller in the Tube. Each time I have carried the stroller down stairs someone asks me if they can help. This has happened every single time.
We returned to the park in the afternoon. It was a sunny day so it was a very easy place to be.

In the evening, Ryan and I left to go to dinner at pan-asian restaurant nearby called E and O. Then we went to the Victoria and Albert museum. We saw a special exhibit called British Design: Innovation in the Modern Age 1948-2012. England has a population of 50 million people and it is roughly the size of Louisiana. It's pretty incredible how much talent and innovation has emerged from this small island. We saw samples of their mid-century modern architecture, an IMac from head of design at apple, Jonathon Ives, samples of work from Damien Hirst and Alexander McQueen, lots of costumes and pictures from famous musicians like Brian Eno, Mick Jagger, the Beatles.. We then wandered around the regular exhibits a bit.

Courtyard of V & A:

Front of museum:

Inside the main entrance hangs a large glass sculpture by Dale Chihuly. This surprised me. First because I didn't know Dale Chihuly was so famous that his work would be displayed in such an esteemed museum. Second because there is nothing about the grand Greek classical design of the entrance that matches with the funky multi-colored sculpture. I wonder how they decided on that piece.

It was 10 when we left. We caught a bus home and stopped for gelato. One of the things I love most about this trip is that we walk everywhere or take public transportation. We get to see and experience so much this way. Jack has become a pro on the scooter and we walk many miles a day.

Saturday, all 9 of us took a high-speed train to Dover. Dover is a small town on the southeastern coast of England. It was a cold, sunny day. We took a boat cruise so we could see the famous White Cliffs then we hung out on the beach for the day. Kate and I took the kids to much less expensive tea around 4. The kids were freaking out from hunger and probably fatigue and Stephen and Ryan couldn't handle the chaos and left. Once the food and tea arrived, they calmed down. A British woman, who had just walked in, complimented us on how well-behaved our children were. I thought she was joking... but she wasn't!

Kate's oldest driving the boat

Our hotel was an old, historic hotel on the water and we had a lovely view of the water. We ate a simple dinner of bread, cheese, and fruit together in our room.. reminding me of my college days.

The next day we toured the very old and stunning Dover castle. We started the day with a tour of the secret war tunnels that had been instrumental in planning a successful evacuation of trapped British and French troops at the Battle of Dunkirk on the French coast which is only 21 miles away. The Germans had pushed the troops to the coast. The British navy evacuated around 300,000 troops over a week. There are miles of tunnels under the castle. The tour guide explained to us that until WWII, Dover had many buildings from medieval times but those buildings were all destroyed by the German bombing. The Germans did not bomb the castle and no one really knows why. It is assumed that Hitler planned to use the castle as a base.

In front of a tunnel

actors at the castle re-enacting the medieval era

We toured the castle which was built in 1100 by King Henry II. We climbed to the roof and had a great view of Dover and a faint view of the French coast. We then returned to our hotel and hopped on the high-speed train and went home.

Day 10

The weather here is similar to Seattle in the spring. Today began as a beautiful sunny day .. mid-day we had a quick thunder and rain storm .. then it became beautiful again. We decided against a formal bus tour and took the regular bus (which is a double decker and very exciting to the kids -- Jack screams 'It's a double decker!' every time he sees one) to the Victoria station then the tube to the Tower of London. What an amazing place. It's 1000 years old. Monarchs lived there for hundreds of years. Anne Boleyn and soon-to-be Queen Elizabeth were imprisoned there (along with many, many others). Unfortunately the line to tour the tower was too long for small kids. We opted to return next week when kids here return to school.

I found this image on google.. better than anything I took.

Since the tower bridge and HMS Belfast (an old battleship) are within walking distance, we went to both. The tower bridge was built in the late 19th century, as were many cool London landmarks.. the age of Victoria was big here. It occurred to me that in 1894 while this majestic bridge was under construction Seattle was a tiny logging town without many buildings since most of the city had burnt down in 1889.

Sadly, the Belfast was closed for repairs so we jumped onto a Thames river cruise and then walked over to Trafalgar Square. The square was built in the mid 19th century (era of Victoria). We hung out for a while and watched a riveting street performer. First he juggled knives. Then he swallowed a very long balloon (inflated.. I was never clear on why he did that particular trick). He also tied himself into a straight jacket and had someone in the crowd tie chains around him and put padlocks on the chains. He, then, escaped from the chains and straight jacket in under 3 minutes. Quite impressive.

Knowing that event could not be topped, we headed home.
While Ryan watched the kids I visited a very large and fancy shopping mall that is about a 10 minute walk from Kate's house. I wanted to visit the European versions of Old Navy. I found some great clothes for the kids but not much for me. The mall had a lot of amazing food.. Here it seems everything is organic or free range or advertised to be untainted by chemicals. Kate told me citizens of the UK lobbied large companies such as Kraft to remove all food dyes from their products. They were successful. So in the UK their processed food is free of those chemicals but the same food in the US is full of them. Lovely.

I am not sure if I have written that we are staying at Kate and Stephen's home. It is a 1000 sq foot, 3 story home in the Notting Hill/ Holland Park neighborhood. I am surprised by how comfortable we are. We have the top floor which is just one open room. All 4 of us sleep there. The second floor has three small bedrooms and 2 bathrooms. The first floor is the kitchen, dining and playing area. 4 adults and 5 kids. We are grateful to be here for so many reasons. I find that hanging out with another adult who has kids the same age as mine just makes life more fun for everyone.

Days 8 and 9

On Tuesday, we traveled about an hour out of town to see the Royal Air Force museum. It is similar to the Museum of Flight in Seattle in that there are airplanes from throughout the 20th century on display. One big difference is that the RAF museum has German WWII airplanes procured after the allied victory. Some of the planes had been shot down and were on display in their bombed out state. The museum also (unintentionally I am sure) told the story of the decline of the British Empire. As the 20th century displays progressed American history played a more prominent role in the exhibit. I was reminded of the exchange between Kevin Kline's character and John Cleese's wife in the movie 'A Fish Called Wanda'

Otto: Don't call me stupid.
Wendy: Why on earth not?
Otto: Oh, you English are *so* superior, aren't you? Well, would you like to know what you'd be without us, the good ol' U.S. of A. to protect you? I'll tell you. The smallest fucking province in the Russian Empire, that's what! So don't call me stupid, lady. Just thank me.
Wendy: Well, *thank* you for popping in and protecting us.
Otto: If it wasn't for us, you'd all be speaking *German!* Singing "Deutschland, Deutschland über alles..."

It makes me wonder who will bail out the US one day..

The trip home from the museum was really long so we returned to Kate's house. The kids played and later we went to the park across the street.

Yesterday was a beautiful sunny day. Kate and I went running through the Holland Park neighborhood then a few hours later, we took the kids to Hyde Park. Ryan ventured out to find half price tickets for a show. We toured Kensington Palace. The public part of the palace is newly remodeled. One of the exhibits was dedicated to Diana and it displayed a few of her dresses and many photographs. Another showed where the King received visitors. There was a lot of Renaissance art. The exhibit also had some very modern aspects. One displayed 44 small boxes -- each in front of a light so you could see the different miniature scenes inside. The room told the story of a change in the rules of succession that ended the rule of the Stuarts. Queen Victoria lived at Kensington Palace. Diana lived there and Cate and William live there now.

View out the window from inside the palace

The Princess Diana memorial playground is very close to the Palace. It's a beautiful playground and the kids played there for several hours. Kate and I enjoyed the sun. The playground only has one exit so the kids could play freely.

That's Jack at the top to the mast.

We decided to go to afternoon tea at the palace. We wandered around the park waiting for 3pm to roll around. There were lots of interesting things to watch -- we went to the pond pictured above. A family was sailing a model sailboat that they told us was almost 100 years old. It was a model of the English sailboat that was supposed to sail in the America's cup in 1914. The boat never sailed because of the war. The boat entranced the kids for quite a while.

Then we were off to tea. Ryan joined us. The kids all drank tea and enjoyed their little sandwiches and desserts. The setting was lovely and the kids did well likely because they were so tired from all the hours we had spent outside.

As an aside, London must be one of the most expensive cities in the world. I try not to convert pounds to dollars because it makes me feel like I come from a third world nation. The above pictured tea cost $160. I am grateful for the experience but it was definitely a once-in-a-lifetime event.

By the time we got home it was 5pm. We had scheduled a babysitter and quickly left to have a quick dinner and see the musical Wicked. It was an amazing production. It was playing at the Apollo Theater in Victoria in the center of London. It's been playing for 6 years and was nearly sold out on a Wednesday night. I have not been to a musical in probably 20 years. It was so much fun. I marveled at the set and the talent of the performers. The singing was unbelievable.. It's amazing that there are musicals like this one occurring all over London with people of equal talent.