Tuck and Roll!

Today was a very exciting day. Jack rolled over for the first time. I had recently read a list of developmental milestones that your child should reach by 5 months. If they don't reach even one of the various activities on the long list then I am supposed to call my doctor. He could do everything on the list except roll over. I thought, how do I get him to roll over? He just seems like a mellow kid, content to stare at the toys hanging from the gymini or jump around in his bouncy chair. And what can my doctor do? Make him lift weights or something??? I just shouldn't read the books...



Clearly, we are more entertained by it than he is.

Moms Rising

Before I had Jack, many people said that everything will change once he arrives. As with every other comment people made regarding parenthood, I had no idea what this meant. Now I know that the statement is not exactly true but the priorities of my daily life have changed, and so has my general consciousness about children. Now that I am a parent, every child is my child. I just read that 22 students were killed at Virginia Tech and all I can think about are their parents, and how their lives are destroyed. When really sick babies come into the hospital, it makes me very sad in a way that it didn't before.

One of the most difficult realizations is that as a society, we do not value children or parenthood. Only since 1992 have you had the right to take 3 months off (unpaid of course) after the birth of your child. Before that, your job was not secure and in small companies, it still isn't. Many people do not have paid sick leave and if you have good daycare, it's usually because you have money and you got lucky. I could go on and on. Luckily, now I have a place to channel my anger and disgust. A group called moms rising (www.momsrising.org) was co-founded by one of the women who started moveon.org. They have a great manifesto that calls for paid family leave, good affordable daycare, paid sick leave, health insurance for all children and a lot more. Family leave legislation has made it to the Washington state house and with enough pressure from voters, it will pass (although possibly not this session).

All developed nations have these rights.. and even some poorer ones as well. We have made so much social progress in the last 30 years so it's exciting to think this may be the next big movement. I hope so.

ps. i know lots of people who don't have kids who are very into them.. they did not have to have a kid to have this awakening.. but i did.

joaquin the jumping bean

I put the music to the video .. it was not playing while he was jumping around .. it just happens to fit perfectly.

more pics

Ryan and Jack went on a walk and found a 4 leaf clover.

My turn

Before i became a parent, I was doing fairly well at what we in yoga call 'cultivating the witness' This means you are able to simply be a witness to another person's experience without making it somehow about you or your own experiences .. instead of assigning judgement to it, you just let it be what it is - sad, joyful, whatever. Let's say that I find that to be more challenging now.

Since Jack was 3 weeks old, I have been going to support groups and spend quite a bit of time around new parents. I have listened to other people talk about how much breast milk they are able to pump, or how big their kid is or how they hold their head up or have been rolling over since they were 4 weeks old. They are simply talking about their experiences. They aren't bragging and they aren't saying their lives are easy but for some reason, that is what I heard because none of those things have come easily to me or jack.

I had not attended the mom's support group for a couple of months because of school or travel. I know the group talks a lot about sleep and I asked the following: Jack has been sleeping through the night for a while now but I wonder if I should be waking him up to feed him. The moderator asked how many hours he slept, I said around 11. There was an audible gasp in the room. Little did I know that some 5 month old babies still only sleep 3-4 hours at a time. I swear, I did not know this. My mom had told me babies sleep through the night around 3 months or so.

To be totally honest, I felt glee at finally having something go my way -- something that can be hard but for me has been easy (at least for a month). I wanted to do high kicks in the middle of the room. Instead as people looked at me incredulously I said, I have had so many hard times! meaning.. i feel like i deserve this lucky break.

Bathtime for Jack

Its not just a book series.

We give Jack baths in our tub now. We used to use a little blue tub but he has long outgrown it. He seems unsure of the bath experience ever since he accidentally sucked water into his mouth and choked a few weeks ago. I plan to take him for swimming lessons this summer so maybe then he will feel more confident in the water. For now, it's definitely easier when there are two of us bathing him - one person in the tub to hold and one person outside to do the bathing and drying.

Superpowers

A friend of mine once told me that her superpower was being able to find parking in any situation. Her husband's anti-superpower was always getting in the wrong line. I have determined that my anti-superpower is always losing socks in the dryer. I do not know what happens to them. It's so bizarre. They must get sucked away into the sock black hole which unfortunately occupies all dryers I use. This inverse superpower I have wasn't so big of a deal when it was just my socks getting sucked into the vortex. Now I am losing jack's socks. Ryan does his own laundry because it bothers him to lose socks.

Jack's superpower is currently that he can sleep through anything. I just cut his fingernails .. he didn't stir.